“Pretentious”

A lil mush won't hurt...

I held your shadow close
The way I never did in years
Searching for your face
Til I’m blindfolded with tears
I ran out of wisdom
Just by getting pass the truth
Selling all of me
To pay the gift I once refused

Woke up in between mornings
Been through all kinds of endings
Now I can’t pretend..

And if it was me desperate
I’d somehow feel secure
To be in a state of longing
Where this feeling can be pure
I am close to just knowing
That the news would soon be you
Hold me close darling..
If its for me then its you

And its right to not know
How the story ends in this show
I’ll wait behind the reel
And watch how it transpires
I have not one hint of you
But your face have been my fire
And while I still can stand
Feel free to hold my hand

I’ll close my eyes they way I need to
I’ll dream away the very sight of you
While I can pretend..

And though you’re in the dark
I can still be as sure
To find comfort in this longing
Where both of us are pure
I’m almost always knowing
That the news would soon be you
Hold me close honey..
It is me waiting for you.

Bath Stuff, Bank stuff and Matthew

Lets see..I had my last interview with Matthew (refer to my entry entitled: "Matthew") last Monday before which i had a banking spree where I found out why they call it "cash flow"..like fluid, it literally just flows through your bank account towards the different seas of payments. I need to pay Rina who served as my cash reservoir during on our last Galera trip. I also borrowed some cash from my friend here and there who were kind enough to lend a charitable hand to less fortunate unemployed people like me (well, back then)...With barely a thousand bucks left, i decided to treat myself to a measly luxury that i can afford at that moment : bath stuff. For some reason, the local grocery I went to seem to know how much cash I only have. I mean my family have been religiously going there since I was a kid and I've never seen that store so empty as it was that day. So to make the long story short, the bath stuff i promised myself were all not there so i settled for the drugstore across where i was only able to get miniature sizes of the bath stuff i wanted..which was well, good also coz i need to pinch myself once in awhile on how much money I only have vs the number of days prior to my employment (damn that was a long segue to my real story..)

Anyhow, the real news is that I'm a good medical test away to a new job which I'am looking forward to. Before I go any further, I think its but right that I finally reveal Matthew's real identity. If you were diligent enough to refer to the "Matthew" entry earlier you would know why I nicknamed the company as such. As I've said he's like a guy..blah,blah,blah. Matthew is a company registered with the real name Nestle who basically supplies most of the dairy products you probably have at home and they finally called me the following day for my medical exam which I had just now. So there, I can say with a considerable amount of certainty that I am finally hired after almost three long months of waiting..

Man, I feel like a bride or rather a "soon-to-be fiance" who just can't wait to be engaged. Well forgive me for the cheeziness on this but for the first time after a long time I want to be into something long term..well atleast in my career. I actually asked God to make my choices clear as crystal and i believe the opportunity just came at the perfect time starring me in the eye like the sunset I'm so fascinated with in Bora. Oh well, I guess I better stop this if I want people to keep visiting my blog.

Thanks for dropping by and do know that I'll be posting my future adventures with Matthew (if all goes well) and of course lotsa poems and songs..whether you care or not, though I hope you will:)

"Poetic"

Waiting..
beneath a sun of endless rays
Wanting..
a drink on sober days
Feeling
all the words that you can't say
Starring
at the colors of this world in grey

So just let me be poetic
though I can't have it all in words
Let me be poetic
Maybe then I will be heard
Let me be poetic
til' i'm done and all rhetoric

If I could rhyme with every dime
if I could swear without a care
If I could write with my left feet
and write this song in every beat

Perhaps you'd listen...

And when my life has all been said
immortalized the way you've read
I will sympathized the way you want
write these words and come undone..
Now your smile is all thats left
I wrote it down as if you're dead
And I made use of your last look
turn all these poems to your new book

So now you'd listen..

So just let me be poetic
though I can't have it all in words
Let me be poetic
Maybe then I will be heard
Let me be poetic
til' i'm done and all rhetoric

Surrender

A mouthful of words
caressing me down my throat
..thoughts on destiny sublime
How I wonder what’s mine

A pillow of desires
Cushions my head each day
I walk pass forever
Every face..every lane

Every thought tend to curveball
To a mystery you seem to know
I billow on trust and faith
No dream nor reality to let go

My heart creates pictures
Like a storm set on fire
Like music on the railroad
Crashing down a lovely lyre

Defining life dramatic
In a silverscreen..hollowed theatre
I’m far from taking a bow
Despite every strange stare

Doing it once more
In your pace..in your word
I looked at your sun inside me
Though it has never shined before

Now my throat is ditch-dried
Left thirsty for all that I’ve hide
Another day written
Towards a destiny I won’t decide

"Go Figure"

Tell me would you bother?
To not think of yourself one day
I’d sing this song once more
If you hear me as I say
Call it candy coated
But its better than a lie
I’d rather you let me go
and let the love we once have die

I’d give you more clues
If you get it down and choose
This ain’t gonna last forever
So go home..go figure

My heart ended up swollen
By the numbness of your face
You going near me won’t help
So stop hoping for a chase

This is my love song
For all that has gone wrong
I’ll keep it cool..keep it simple
Just so you won’t stay long

I’d give you more clues
If you get it down and choose
This ain’t gonna last forever
So go home..go figure

"Mindorinned"

Got on the boat called "Arribba" shippin' down the Mindoro shore forever. Two boys, two girls, two pairs..do the math, the four of us finally began an overnight getaway. Our boys were pretty much convinced that the long boat ride did all of us good since we got to the resort just in time to get a good deal on an overnight reservation at a place near the beach front. My tummy's been screaming LUNCH the whole boat ride so we walked to a grill place which served Puerto Galera's famous kebab. I had my lunch for free, thanks for the dead fly on my calamares which was friendly enough to not do my tummy any harm. The rest of the gang had their fill while I try to not ruin the rest of my vacation..there's dinner anyway. I wanted to brand this vacation with dread locks on my head so I slew in 250 bucks to get my hair done while Rina had her ceremonial by-the-beach massage. For some reason, the other twosome can't wait to have their dose of alcohol before sunset which kept them intoxicated while waiting for us. With hotdogs on sticks, indian mangoes severed with chili anchovies and fruit shakes at around 5:35pm..we decided to be "MINDORINNED".

Dinner went great as we settled to have it along the shore. Rina and Maco had barbecue kebab..I think Eli had liempo compensating it with tomatoes while I had a guilt-free, fly-proof tangigue. Filled up as we intend to be, we ended up sleepy. We had the boys waiting while Rina and I catched some snooze before heading to the nearest bar for a night-out. For some reason, I can hardly remember what went on that night. The last stuff I remember were a round of card games and Mindoro sling with a crowd try to get "Mindorinned" themselves.

Our last day was marked mostly with Rina's theatrical screams. 7:00 am, a two way radio with her voice screaming started our last day that made us get up and have shakes by the beach. How I wished that time that the sun would just show up so I can bring home a good tan but as in anything, I guess you can never really have it all. We got the whole island's attention as our good friend Rina screamed our banana boat ride away. We fell off a couple of times..but it sure was fun (well, atleast for Maco, Eli and me).

My backs's just starting to ache now..approximately 24 hours from our journey back to Manila. I don't want to sound like one of those summer commercials by saying : "It was a blast!" but it definitely was.

Mindoro Slingers!!!