I'm published!!!!

Pulela in the inquirer

Last night I had a terrible dream.

I woke up without you reaching out for me.

What are you feeling about September?

Me? I am scared to lose you

I am scared to end it.

I am scared that telling you my fears of losing you will make you end it.

I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH to hold you back from doing what you want to do but I LOVE YOU EVEN MORE to let you go just like that.

I am sure that you know that this should come around soon no matter how we try to dismiss it.

God knows how time and again, I try to initiate having us talk about this.

Should we let go?

Do you still believe that at this point, what we have is still not worth it all?

I LOVE YOU, I really do.

I am in deep pain while writing this.

I am writing in random because at first in many times, I find myself doing this to just effortlessly release all of what I feel.

I know that you have warned me about this from the very start and believe me, I still would like to convince myself now that I am as strong as I was when I decided to proceed with this.

I have never felt so darn happy when I was with you as when I was with anyone else.

Right now, you are my best friend and the love of my life.

I don't want you to go, I really don't. I will be an idiot and a liar to pretend that I am ok with all this.

Once and for all, I just want to veer away from this state of denial I am at. This state to which I have sheltered myself so we can enjoy each and every moment of togetherness.

I will miss you.